Chapter 11: Time Attendant

The fifth week after the fight with Blood Owl. At the hospital.

Paper Hero had more or less recovered from his injuries. With twenty-second-century medicine, practically anyone who wasn't killed on the spot could be saved.

He was expected to be ready for discharge after a few more days of rest. He already healed faster than most people, and HL was covering all his expenses, putting him in the best room and paying for expensive medication.

That morning, Deacon, the fat fellow, barged in without knocking, carrying a box of food. He set it down and said, “Try some when you get a chance. My wife made muffins.”

Paper Hero was reading a newspaper floating in midair. “To be honest, when I told you last time not to bring any more, I wasn't just being polite. Your wife's muffins really are terrible.”

“Ha, of course I know. Why else would I bring them to you? If they were good, I'd eat them myself,” Deacon replied shamelessly. Then he turned to close the door and settled his backside onto a stool in the room. “Listen, you're getting out in a few days. The director and I agree you should take some more time off.”

Paper Hero lowered the newspaper. “I've rested long enough.”

“I knew you'd say that,” Deacon said. “So there's a message I need to pass on. Once you're out, you'll need to keep ‘quiet’ about certain things.” He made air quotes with his fingers.

“Don't worry. I don't particularly want to talk about that night anyway,” Paper Hero said.

Deacon shook his head. “That's only part of it. There are also those superpowers of yours. Try not to show them off from now on.”

“Is that really necessary? Hiding something even the station's cleaners know about?”

“That's what your old friend Malone wants. Which means it's what HL wants. Besides, buddy, people used to think those ‘little tricks’ of yours were just entertaining. Nobody ever imagined you could conjure up a tornado or a giant snake,” Deacon said. “Mind reading, bending spoons, making light bulbs explode—anyone with a reasonably open mind can accept things like that. But the powers you showed that night really scared everyone. It was like you'd turned into a comic-book character like Superman overnight. I don't think the public is ready to accept that yet.”

Paper Hero raised an eyebrow. “Is that what Malone told you?”

“I only borrowed a few lines. But yes, that was pretty much the gist of it.” Deacon took a chocolate bar out of his jacket and began munching on it, showing no intention of touching the muffins.

“All right, I understand. Keep a low profile. That's what I always do,” Paper Hero replied resignedly.

They chatted for a while longer, then Deacon said goodbye. After lunch, Paper Hero was planning to take a walk in the corridor when more unexpected visitors arrived.

This time they knocked. “Come in,” Paper Hero said.

Two men entered. One was Faru, again wearing a black military overcoat, though he no longer looked as haughty in Paper Hero's presence as he had at their last meeting.

The other man wore the expression of someone who'd been constipated for about three days. He had messy, medium-length gray hair and lightly tinted sunglasses. What caught Paper Hero's attention was his silver-gray uniform, a kind he had never seen before.

Faru spoke first. “Hello, Officer Nice. We've met once before. Allow me to introduce myself properly. I'm Lieutenant Colonel Ge Faru, stationed at HL's European headquarters.”

Paper Hero showed little reaction, replying calmly, “Yes. Pleased to meet you.”

Faru then gestured toward his companion. “This gentleman is from EAS...”

“My name is Joseph Nolan. My colleagues call me Time Attendant. I was supposed to be on leave, and this assignment wasn't even my responsibility, but now those cruel, cold-blooded, utterly unconscionable exploiters are squandering my precious time off, disrupting all my plans and making me fly here from the tropics at a moment's notice to see you, so you should have some idea how urgent and important this is. Please cooperate so I can get back to my vacation!” Time Attendant picked up right where Faru left off, words spilling from his mouth faster than most people could type. Remarkably, his articulation remained clear and his delivery full of expression.

Paper Hero gave a couple of dry chuckles. “Then may I ask what you want with me?”

“Based on intelligence obtained by EAS, our superiors have decided to assess the abilities of Officer Elot Nice, otherwise known as Paper Hero. You. The results must be reported back as soon as possible,” Time Attendant replied.

“Could I first ask what sort of department EAS is?” Paper Hero said.

Time Attendant answered without slowing down. “A hundred years ago, the imperial war hero Duke Carlo was secretly appointed to a post designated EAS, or Extra Ability Supervisor. Over time, that post developed into the organization that exists today. Our offices move frequently, our membership numbers are classified, and our benefits are an outrage to gods and men. At any rate, I only get two weeks of leave a year. In short, EAS is primarily responsible for supervising and managing the ability users on this planet.”

Faru added, “Don't worry, Mr. Nice. They're simply doing their jobs. Whenever conditions permit, the Empire tries to obtain information on every ability user of Strong rank or above. This is for your safety too.”

Paper Hero gave a cold laugh. “No need to explain. I understand. Strong-rank ability users are either wanted fugitives or have been recruited by HL or some organization I've never even heard of. Very few are in my position. One way or another, you'll need a rough estimate of my strength and to put me under surveillance while you're at it, so certain important people can rest easy.”

Time Attendant seemed entirely untroubled by his remarks. “Excellent. Mutual understanding makes the work more efficient. Please come to the Second Branch this afternoon. Preparations for the test are complete.”

“Why does this invitation sound like some sort of inhumane experiment on a human subject?” Paper Hero said.

“This isn't a medical examination, Mr. Nice,” Time Attendant said. “EAS doesn't need to perform any physiological tests on ability users of your type. We just need the right environment to see the maximum destructive power your abilities can produce.”

“Oh? So there's a test like that?” Paper Hero asked curiously. “Do you set up a few hundred metal dummies somewhere especially sturdy and see how long it takes me to tear them to pieces?”

Time Attendant turned and left the room without wasting a second. Who knew what he was in such a hurry to do? Before he disappeared from view, he left them with one last remark. “I'll be the one taking the punishment. I look forward to your arrival.”